The Dance Team Debacle
It will be one of those monumental occasions that will remain in my mind long after my oldest is an adult. Oh the joys of being the mom of a dancer.
It began several years ago, seven to be exact. I watched, with camera in hand, while my baby turned very unbalanced pirouettes across the floor at the local rec center gymnasium. I chuckled to myself, but clapped loudly and cheered her on at her first dance recital. After the performance we praised her for the great job she did. Twirling in her pink tutu out to the parking lot, she joyfully announced that she wanted to be a ballerina when she “growed” up. I looked at her, and her cuteness in that moment, and promised her a world of dance opportunities.
Well, that little promise came back to bite me a few weeks ago. I stepped into the crowded room at the dance studio. It was a Parent’s Meeting for all prospective Company dancers. I felt hot, flushed, and a knot growing in my stomach. What have we gotten into? The cute, little, smiley dance instructor handed me a thick packet. I quickly skimmed through looking for a certain word. And there it was, a few paragraphs down, in big, bold print, “Fees.” And thus the reason for the knot in my stomach. It actually said, “four easy installments of $$$. Oh goodness.
The Parent’s Meeting went on and on. The knot in my stomach continued to grow. I fanned myself with the thick packet. As I looked around the room I saw eagerness mixed with pride in many eyes. I saw giddiness in some. And I saw blank stares in a select few—myself included. Is this it? Have I arrived? Am I becoming a Dance Mom? Lord. Help. Me.
Then it dawned on me. The word “fees” was not the only word to fear. Oh no. A page over from that, read 2012-13 Schedule. And this was not a paragraph. Nope. It was an entire page! Life may have drained out of me completely. I think I saw the word mandatory a dozen times. How will this ever work? We have a life outside of dance? Don’t they know that?
I felt anger start to boil up in me. I started to imagine the careful words I would choose to tell Maddie this was not going to work. And then it happened. Out of the corner of my eye I saw sweet Maddie sitting next to me. She was listening intently as the Company Director explained the thick packet. Her forehead wasn’t wrinkled. Her lips weren’t pursed together in an angry line. She was beaming. Her dream was coming true, while my nightmare was beginning.
It was in that moment I realized it was time to get over myself. Memories of my youth flooded my mind. Ballet, Jazz, Plays, Musicals, Speeches, all of it. My parents somehow paid for all my fleeting interests. They made time and calculated schedules so that I could be here and there in a timely manner. They sacrificed. And there it was, that word—Sacrifice.
Sacrifice conjures up many thoughts in my head, but in this situation it means the time has come for me to make the same sacrifices my parents made for me. It’s kind of like the circle of life for parenting. The road ahead seems long, and I appreciate the prayers every Monday, Thursday, Friday and some Saturdays as I drive to and from the dance studio. But it’s a season. And for this season my daughter has an opportunity to learn, grow and thrive while working hard at something she loves. There will be challenges. There will be sacrifices made for our whole family this season. But I know in the end it will have been worth it. Right? Right? Tell me it will? Tell me. Tell me.
Very well said, Krista! Sometimes the word, “sacrifice” is hard to swallow especially when life is already busy. The other words, “a season” means it doesn’t last forever. Sometimes it feels like the winter season but the joy comes in the summer season. Bless you, my child! MOM
I can empathize completely- I have become the sports Mom! What a ministry God is openning up for us to love the other players through Matt coaching and me with the other Moms (some are single Moms- I believe that is the toughest job on the planet:-) So, may this be an opportunity for God to open up new doors for your whole family as He brings Maddie the desires of her heart and may He make a way for all the costs & resources to be provided!
Yes, it will be worth it.
The sacrifice is worth not having her “what if” for her whole life. Many people don’t have the opportunity. She is so blessed to have you as parents.
Our day will come with our little princess. It’s nice to have such a real role model. Keep up the stories!!! I love reading them. :o)
How I remember all the running we did, fees paid, some volunteer time spent, etc. with your activities! And it was all well worth it! However even as a dad, I can relate very much to what you wrote. ~Dad
I can totally identify with this blog….as a mother I wanted the best for my children and tried to do everything possible for them.
Knowing Maddie, I can just see her little beaming face as she waited expectantly – not expecting anything but to be able to pursue her dream.
Motherhood is really a life of sacrifice, but it does not seem like sacrifice because the level of love outweighs it all.
You are a great MOM!!
As the Dad here, I remember for a short moment Maddie looking at us in tears and saying “it’s going to cost so much money” and more thoughts along those lines. We told here under no uncertain terms “That is not your concern. Mom and Dad will take care of it and all you need to know is whether or not this is something you want to pursue–and if it is, give it your all and we will take care of the rest!” — As a kid, I never knew the details of where our money came from so that I could do the things I got to do, or live in the places we got to live, and I suppose my Mom and Dad might have said these very same things to me. I must say, my girls echo the heart of Krista, and I love that about them and about her. I am a lucky one.